When is the Right Time to Do IT?

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Let’s talk about sex for a minute, shall we? First and foremost we have to establish some basic ground rules for sex. First, to begin with, sex is WONDERFUL! And secondly, sex is natural! I would like to believe that everyone is in agreeance with those two standpoints. Human sexuality is one of the most powerful, baffling, mysterious forces in the entire universe. We have allowed sex to become a dirty word. It has even become a taboo subject to the point that we cannot mention it in certain places without getting squeamish looks, i.e. Church. If we had to repent every time we had a sexual thought we’d never get off our knees.

What I believe has caused problems for mankind is the fact that we have lost sight of the purpose of sex. Dr. Myles Munroe once said, “When you don’t understand the purpose of a thing, you will tend to abuse a thing.” Think of the last time you had a table with an uneven leg. Most people’s first reaction is to grab a book/magazine to level it off. Just that easily the purpose of that book has been abused. There are more adult bookstores in America than McDonald’s restaurants. Pornography is an 8 billion dollar per year business. Sex has become like shaking hands. So when it comes to sex, let us examine how things started off in the beginning.

Many that believe in God credit God with shaping mankind with the creation of Adam and Eve. With these two, came the best sex in creation. There was no deceit, no masks, no hiding and most of all no morning after uneasiness. One of the very first commands given to human beings was to be fruitful and multiply. God made us sexual creatures! One of the special things about Adam and Eve that made their sex so great was the fact that they were married. This is where I’ll lose a couple of you, but bear with me for a second.

When a man & a woman enter into a marriage covenant, the seal of that covenant is done physically (“one flesh” from the Hebrew word “to know”). A covenant is defined as a binding agreement between two or more parties and can only be broken by death. This is why covenants are different from contracts. Contracts can be broken, released or renegotiated. When a man and woman have sex, they form a covenant with their bodies. To be more specific, they form a “blood” covenant. God gave the woman a hymen that was designed to be broken in the first act of intercourse. In the breaking of the hymen there is the letting of blood. Thus the Lord built into marriage the blood covenant.

When you have sex with another person you’re not just touching another person’s body, you’re touching their soul. The problem with strip clubs, videos and porn is not that they emphasize sexuality too much, but that they don’t emphasize it enough. They eliminate relationship. Physical intimacy should only increase where commitment increases. When sexual involvement gets ahead of the commitment there are usually problems. Pornography is harmful because it makes sex trivial, uninteresting and dull. Most people can testify to the fact that their best moment of climax occurred when more than their body was involved. It happened when their body, mind and soul became a part of it.

God created us a specific way, male and female. One compliments the other, and one is made for the other emotionally, physiologically, mentally and spiritually. Sex in and of itself is not wrong! When addressing the question, “When is the right time to do it?” one should ask themselves a few things prior to considering an action:

1) Is it expedient?
Is it the right thing to do at this particular time? You will not spontaneously combust by not having sex. You will not shrivel up and die. And no, it will not fall off! Some people struggle with self-esteem issues and think if they share their bodies, then they’ll be liked, or even more…loved.

2) What will it cost me?
Being “love-sick” is a reality. Man is a spirit, he has a soul and both are clothed/housed in a body. In sex, regardless of it being between a married couple or not, soul-ties form. A soul-tie is a relationship whereby two souls are joined/knitted together, and in a sense become one. Tie, meaning “to attach, bind, fasten” or “to restrain from independence/freedom”. So when someone slashes your tires, hides in the bushes, or plays on your phone after a break-up, it’s not always because they’re crazy. Sometimes it is because you have a part of their soul and they haven’t learned how to break free from you. I like to refer to those as STDs (Spiritually Transmitted Diseases). Let’s go a little deeper. Paul told the believers that each one of their bodies was a naos, a sanctuary for God (God’s dwelling place, place of worship). Thus, any time you have sex, you have church. My question to you now is, “What kind of kind of church are you running?” Do you have any members, or only visitors? Are they at least paying tithes?

3) Lastly, What can I do?
Some that read this may skim over it and think nothing of it. Others are truly hurting from past mistakes and are trying to find a way out. You are not alone. Healing is possible. Realize you are the victor, but you can’t defeat what you won’t face. Regardless of how you have been labeled by society, you’re not nasty, you’re human. You may not be able to have a do-over, but you can reposition yourself and have a make-over. Typically, your deepest craving for intimacy is not for another body, it is a craving for intimacy with God. I don’t believe God expects you not to love stuff. He simply wants you to love Him more than it.

Tagged as: Commitment, Intimacy, Love & War, Sex

Article by Mike Scruggs

Pastor Michael Scruggs, Founder of Light of the World Ministries, located in Cincinnati Ohio, is an ordinary man with an extraordinary vision. With the mandate to “bind up the brokenhearted” and “proclaim liberty to the captives,” he is seizing the Kingdom of God by force. Blessed with an uncanny delivery, Pastor Mike uses his dependence on the Word of God and a passion for the empowerment of people everywhere to bring forth an uncompromising message for “such a time as this.” To learn more about Pastor Mike and Light of the World please visit: www.LOWcincy.org.

Mike has written 4 article(s) for us.