When Cheating Goes Wrong…Real Wrong

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Steve McNair & Wife

Now I am not one to speak ill of the dead (a concept I wish more people would learn and understand) so I don’t want to make this specific to Steve McNair, but I would like to use his unfortunate demise as an example for a topic of discussion. Let me start by saying I am terribly sorry for the loss that his wife and children have suffered and I hope that she finds peace. Additionally, I hope that the legacy of Steve McNair is not sullied by the mistakes that he made in his personal life.

Moving on, many people have been talking about the audacity of the situation Mr. McNair was in prior to his death. For the sake of this let’s pretend this wasn’t “Air” McNair, but instead it was pookie. He had a beautiful wife and 4 loving sons at home, yet he decided to cheat on them with a 20 year old woman who according to the picture I’ve seen, was really no match. Not only did he step out with this young woman he also bought her an Escalade and a Condo. The worst of the worst kind of cheating. I can’t imagine what this 20 y/o was doing to make him step out like THAT. Some may guess that it was due to some kinda of blackmail, but of course there is no basis for thinking this so who really knows. I can’t imagine that he would be that afraid of his wife that he would drive himself deeper into a trap that I’m sure he was well aware could end up ugly in the end. I am sure that these types of women at that level of crazy show some signs of it beforehand. Clearly being murdered in the midst of your infidelity is extreme. The punishment doesn’t fit the crime, but the point is, there are consequences. When it comes to crimes of passion, logic is seldom at work.

The Gov. of SC is another one. You are flying around the world on taxpayers money all to get some on the side, nevermind your marriage. In a time when we’re busy fighting about the “sanctity” of marriage, our politicians are quick to destroy it. Now he’s ruined his career (it sickens me that all of a sudden, Repubs are saying that we he does in his bedroom has no bearing on his job. Bill Clinton anyone?) and his family is suffering all because he just had to take it there.

So with that said, does cheating ever really work out? I can’t really bring myself to believe that it does. We talk about cheating quite a bit on the blogosphere because it’s an issue that is so relevant. I know here at The FreshXpress we have several blogs that answer “Why men cheat” “Why men cheat with women uglier than the one they have” “Why women cheat” etc. What we fail to really dig into is the consequences of such actions. After watching the movie “Obsessed” we also realized that you don’t even have to actually cheat for the consequences to be dire. While that’s a movie, Steve McNair’s situation was real life. Real life that happens all the time. Ever see the show “Snapped” on Oxygen? If you haven’t, I suggest any man thinking about cheating watch that first. It’s funny, because we have also talked about how women are more forgiving when her S.O. has cheated on her whereas men are far more quicker to hulk up and get people bodied. However “Snapped” and other real Lifetime situations would be proof to the contrary.

So knowing that women are naturally prone to emotion as it is, knowing that in a cheating situation you have to watch your back coming and going, really WHY DO MEN STILL CHEAT? I say that you have to watch your back coming and going because it seems that when women are cheating, the man that she’s cheating with does not develop the same attachment. They see it for what it is. Quite the opposite in most cases concerning a man stepping out.

Is it really worth all of that? Again, I revisit the original question: When does cheating really work out? Ok, so you’re cheating and so far so good. However there always comes a point when you have to choose. Either the side chick is wanting more, or perhaps your wife is demanding more of your time. You are in a tug-of-war that will end up with you torn in half. Let’s say you leave your wife for the side chick, because she was just *that* awesome. Then you’re in a relationship with a woman that has already proven that she doesn’t value relationships and the next thing you know, the grass really wasn’t all that much greener. Let’s say you’re cheating solely for sexual reasons, your wife is awesome, and the side chick is really not sweating you all that hard. Sounds like a plan until your wife finds out due to a minor misstep on your part. That thing that you were doing just as a release has become your worst nightmare and you find yourself losing everything.

Is it really worth all of that?

I’m not talking about cheating in non-marital relationships because while that sucks it just speaks to the fact that you’re single until you jump the broom. I’m talking about cheating when the stakes are high, real high. I’ve seen this happen up close and personal, and I just don’t understand how it could be worth the consequences. Even if the marriage survives the adultery the soul of the relationship took a hard blow, and in some cases the marriage becomes the ghost of good times past.

They say what’s done in the dark always comes to the light. And it’s true. ALWAYS. It may take a while, but it will happen.

Let’s discuss!

Tagged as: Cheating, Steve McNair

Article by Jennifer Garrett

JG* is a small-town turned big-city blogger who once wrote the random yet ever-creative look into the life of a girl entering the Quarterlife. These days as she prepares for her MBA program at The Ohio State University she's turned into quite the "Susie The Riveter." Working with teens by day, cooking delicious meals at night. Check out her blog showcasing her delicious recipes at http://jgrunsthekitchen.wordpress.com. Follower her on Twitter @JGRunsTheCity

Jennifer has written 49 article(s) for us.