I don’t think I want children. Ever. However this past weekend, I found myself looking at all of the infants being pushed around in strollers, being carried kangaroo style by loving mommies and daddies, and I seen the absolutely cutest pint-sixed Halloween costumes. Then I thought to myself:
“Aweeee, how cute, could I do that?”….
I know after the newness wears off, I’d be faced with piles of dirty diapers, feedings, 3am screaming at the top of the lung wake-up calls, and no ME time and let me be honest, I LOVE my me time.
When I meet guys, especially new guys, they are floored at the fact that I’m pushing 30, and do not have not one midget diva running around. Then I politely say or rather yell. “Hell no, not me….uhhhh un, nope, nadda”. Some guys find it funny, others make promises that “I will carry their seedlings” (and I make mental note to self, do not return his call), an ex said it was a deal breaker and someone that I’ve been dating on & off for the last, insert number of years here, has made a few statements in passing about me being a good mother. Which, over time, I’m sure I could be a good one, but I think I make a better “Auntie”, cause I can sugar them up and send them home. I have yet to discover a rent-a-baby.
I know there are some people who really, really want kids, and give me the side-eye, once the topic comes up and I rebuke it. I’m not a monster. In fact, it’s best that I don’t have any children and I wish the “bad” parents would have analyzed it the way I did before they got knocked up or done the knocking up.
Other Reasons Why Tots Are Not For Me:
- I love sleeping in
- I love vacationing, preferably at places that have age restrictions. I don’t want to be around your children while I’m on vacation
- I love shopping and not having to worry about if the little rug-rat has to potty, breastfeed, be escorted to the potty…you get the point
- I like having the option of just going. If I want to pack my bags & move, or take a last-minute trip somewhere I can do that
- I can’t see myself having kids with any guys I currently know or have known in the past
- Money. Enough said
- I think pregnant women are adorable, however, giving up all things I love for 9 months is not sexy
So what do you say family? Do you see children in your future, why or why not?
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
I see at least 3 children in my future. I just think some people have the desire and some do not. The desire within me is STRONG. So I personally can’t wait to get started on all of that. LOL
Let me add that I love the picture for this post. Love it!
I don’t see children in my future for ALL of the reasons you’ve mentioned. I love my freedom. At times I ponder the thought and I am quickly brought back to reality when I see an annoying child. Furthermore, I don’t want kids before marriage and even after that it’s touch and go. I’d have one or two if he wanted. Until then, I’m extremely careful about who I see because at this point in my life and career I don’t forsee having an abortion
OMG!! I feel as though I wrote this myself. My friends get on me all the time about not wanting kids. I have 12 neices and nephews and one great-nephew. I don’t NEED kids. Plus, I’m too selfish to have kids. You said it best, “it’s best that I don’t have any children and I wish the “bad” parents would have analyzed it the way I did before they got knocked up or done the knocking up”. I like having my me time and I’m not ready to give it up yet. Maybe someday I’ll change my tune, but until then, I’m going to keep doing what I want to do because right now, my life is all about ME.
I keep flipflopping on this issue. Sometimes I’m like oh no never will I have kids. I am waaay to selfish and proud of it. But then other times (like this weekend) a close friend will bring their baby over and I fall in love with the feeling. So I don’t know. I’m still up in the air.
I love and want kids! Can’t imagine living my life without having any. Having said that, my current situation does not allow for any half-steppin on the pregnancy-prevention front, and that’s REAL! I have an infant niece (mini-me) who I love and adore and spend WAY too much money on…and then I send her cute lil butt back to her mom! Amen to you and everyone else who knows they don’t want kids and stick to that! I work with lots of families where the mother obviously is self-absorbed and wants her ‘me’ time…at the expense of her kids! Some people are selfish, and I don’t necessarily mean that in a negative way. If you have the realization that you enjoy being the master of your own life, coming and going as you please, and that’s what makes you happy, GREAT! Children are just not conducive to that lifestyle. I’d rather more people just accept that they really don’t want to have kids and leave it be then have them and keep trying to live a self-centered lifestyle. A cousin of mine and his wife, I swear the only reason they had kids is because all of their coworkers in their little circle had kids, and it was fashionable. Now they aren’t half raising them, and it’s sad.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with not wanting kids…every woman isn’t meant to be a mother.
Is it weird that, as a woman, I hardly ever think about this? For me, having kids at some point is a given. I have five neices and nephews and I love them to death. But, I’ll be happy to have kids of my own one day….with a husband. Being a single mother is simply not an option for me. Forget abortion, if I found out I were pregnant, I would die — facedown in the Pacific Ocean never to be seen again. I give MAJOR props to all the women I know who take care of their kids by themselves. iCant and iWont. I agree with the author in that too many people have kids who shouldn’t be anybody’s parent. I’m against sterilization on Earth, but I think God needs to step in and close up some wombs and shut down sperm motility for those who don’t have the common sense or desire to parent.
I am always up in the air on this topic. I love children, I always have, but I can’t see myself being someone’s mother!!! Becoming a parent (by decision and not a slip up) is the most selfless act of love that one can demonstrate. I think about how my mom and dad would give me anything in the world to make me happy whether i needed it or not and Im not quite sure I could fill their shoes!! If I do become a parent, it will be after I have done a lot of the things I wanted to do because nothing is worse than harboring that “What If” feeling! So perhaps in the future, my husband and I will have a couple tots, but right now that is the last thing from my mind.
I’ve thought about this subject, plenty. I like to conjecture “when I have a kid … my kid will be like … ” and so on and so forth. But I am not sure I was to dedicate at least $250,000 of my hard earned dollars to raise someone. I am not even sure that I will ever be married and for me marriage is necessary before I decide to be a parent … I’d need someone there to be the other 100% parent so that my kid(s) can have 200% of parentage.
I haven’t even dedicated myself to be some little rug rat’s Big Sister (in the Big Brother Big Sister program) or owning a house or deciding to STAY in one city … how can I possibly decide that I will dedicate myself to a LIFE? A WHOLE LIFE! … that needs to learn morals and about God or some higher power, about who to trust, and not talking to strangers and division and how to read and how to pee in the toilet and how to not be an emo teenager (lol) … I’m just overwhelmed thinking about these few things … I won’t say that I will never ever ever ever ever ever have a kid but it’ll be a while before I actually think seriously on that. Maybe when I’m 37 and not 27 … and still maybe not even then.