[Editor's Note: I ran this post some 18 months ago, and strangely it still seems to get new reads (and comments) everyday. It's right up there with all those Karrine Stefans posts as the 10 most read in the history of AB.com. I have no idea what that says about the quality of this blog, but in any event, here's the post, reFreshed... for 09' (you suuuuuckas!). If you wanna weigh in, have at it.]
Before ya’ll jump down my throat for this one, peep the post title again.
I don’t wanna burn too much on this, since it’s been talked about ad nauseum on enough other blogs already, but recently Lil’ Wayne’s 28th babymama, Lauren London (ATL, This Christmas, and uhhh… what else has she been in?!?) recently sparked a minor controversy with some of her comments in the (now deceased) lad-mag King Magazine. When asked the type of guys she prefers, she responded with these words of sage wisdom and whatnot.
KING: So you want a man who’s both honest and thug?
London: An authentic gangsta—that deletes about half the rap game off your list. I love guys who are street. I won’t even give soft guys a chance. Menace II Society is my shit! Caine was like my first crush. Actually, O-Dog was my true dream guy. I was in love with him, from that opening scene where he pops the convenience-store worker. He had me from that gunshot [laughs]. He was ’hood, and I loved that.
Never mind the fact that Caine ended up dead on a sidewalk at the end of the movie, London (who always seems a few footlongs shy of a Quiznos) presents a sentiment that I’ve heard from lots of other brothers over the years.
My life as a single guy is distant history, so I’m sorta pleading the fifth on this one. I can’t say I ever experienced anything relevant to this situation because I’m not a thug, nor was I ever attracted to women who were attracted to thugs. But general reaction in the blogosphere from men has been that London’s right, Black Women do like thugs and pass over more “positive” brothers, while many black women think Lauren’s a bubblehead. In any event, since she’s since gone on to procreate with an incarcerated goblin, I guess she meant what she said, and this clearly wasn’t a shock quote just for show. I guess I give her points for “keepin’ it trill” if nothing else. She’s a ride or die chick, so long as those child support checks keep clearin’.
Anyways, I figure I’ll leave this one up to you guys to debate.
Question: Does Lauren London have a point? Do Black women generally prefer thugs over more “upstanding” brothers or is she just speaking for herself? Fellas, assuming you’re not a thug do you find Black Women go for the flashy and gritty a bit too often?
Article by Average Bro
AverageBro is a world champion sh*t-talker and your favorite blogger’s favorite blogger. Peep more at AverageBro.com, or Twitter.com/AverageBro.
Average has written 153 article(s) for us.
Senor_H_El_Jefe (24)
bitter black dude (15)
Abdul Wilson (12)
JG* RunsTheKitchen (12)
the uppity negro (12)
J Mark (11)
Idu Charles (10)
true2me (9)
E. Reed (7)
R0cktheMike (6)
Yvonne (6)
Ashleigh L. A. (5)
blackchild (5)
Garfield (5)
Diggame (4)
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m the furthest thing from being a thug. I think some females are just looking for a male to protect them…..sort of like a bodyguard (as Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” plays).
I have to say that I have dated the squarest of square and the thuggest of thug. I personally can relate more to a thug. I am a bit rough around the edges, outspoken, not afraid of most shyt, curse, drink. I can be loud, and I have a very strong personality. All those qualities “thug” men can possess. I prefer someone who isn’t very square and buppieish well because I scare away the squares. The “thug” can handle my personality better and actually enjoys it and my company. What I dont like is how ppl assume that “thugs” are abusive, treat their women worse than square buppie dudes, participate in illegal activities etc. Its the way they carry themselves that turns us on. WHo wants a man who tweezes his eyebrows or who is afraid to speak up when another man is disprespecting you. Again, I can relate more to a “thug” than I can you squares, but it doesn’t mean I’m dumb, ignorant, want to be abused, dont love myself ETC. Seems u squares just want to feel superior…aaaaaaand I hate it
@true2me, LOL I want you do to a blog titled “Things I don’t hate”. I die laughing on Twitter when you end tweets with “I hate it!” lolol *hugs*
@JG*, LMAO..someone else asked me to do that. I can’t think of many things..but it will prove interesting when I do come up w them. Watch one day I’ll be drinking and talking and BAM..my list. *hugs*
@true2me, Let me also add that even though I like them….un-thuggish… they still always hold it down. I tend to date Frat boys…. LOL and I’ve seen them have to get into with dudes before. I fear not when in their care.
@JG*, cool. And yall dont get me wrong. Im not saying men are black and white. I dont really care for labels. I only label for argument sake
thug /θʌg/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [thuhg] Show IPA ,
Use thug in a Sentence
See web results for thug
See images of thug
–noun 1. a cruel or vicious ruffian, robber, or murderer.
2. (sometimes initial capital letter) one of a former group of professional robbers and murderers in India who strangled their victims.
@Amadeo, lmao..u broke out the dictionary. Reminded me of the use of the word “nigga” debate. I guess you trying to say that if you are a thug u kill and murder. *shrugs*. Then the title of this blog post should completly change. It should say “Why do women like men who grew up in an inner city and didn’t go to college, and may have gotten into trouble in the past or presently” …IM JUST SAYIN
What I don’t get about this is that women always say there’s only two types of dudes. THAT IS FALSE, their are Thugs, Fake Thugs, Nice Guys, Squares, & Players. What makes me mad with black women sometimes, is the fact that they are afraid to try something new. Society is telling young ladies if a guy wants to do the right things in life and not be product of his environment hes a square. I honesty think its how some women are raised to be attracted to thugs. Lets be honest most black women who are attracted to thugs, fathers wasn’t in the picture or they’re mother was bringing around different guys in their life. They get so used to that lifestyle it makes them feel like if he is not this than its wrong. We really need to analyze what we call a “Thug” is really is and the traits that come with it. Everybody is different we all have different traits and different ways of carrying ourselves. I think there’s a huge misconception that nice guys are pushovers and wont protect their women. Just because a guy shows that he cares DOES NOT MEAN THAT HE IS SOFT. Everybody has to understand no one is perfect but, we cannot be closed minded to other things than what outside of your usual norm is.
@Nice Guy, good post
@Nice Guy,
Great post bro. I don’t quite get why men are either thugs/or pushovers. I know girls don’t want to be put into categories of either good girls/or boppers. Most of my close friends are college educated dudes with career. It’s never a question if something jumps off if they are down, but at some point you can’t fight everyone that disrespects you. 9 times out of 10 you have so much more to lose than he does. I’m at an age where I don’t need to prove how tough I am. I don’t care you can talk tough, just don’t touch me/ or my girl. I’ve had too many close friends get shot/or die in the past two years, because people don’t fight anymore they shoot guns. I’m not dying over my pride, or having to validate myself to a girl. If you think I’m soft thanks for playing I have some lovely parting gifts. Life is all about growth and picking your battles. If I have the same F* the world attitude I had at 18 I have much bigger problems then being seen as a nice guy.
lol @ “London (who always seems a few footlongs shy of a Quiznos)”… After ATL I was like DAYUM so I Youtube-ed her and was thinking the same thing…Shes a few fries, short of a Happy Meal.
@Mark, Like the Temptations sang – “Beauty Is Only Skin Deep”
I like my dudes quasi-emo and metrosexual. LOL I like the “pretty boy” or whatever the hell that means. But he’s probably rocking a button up, bowtie, Sperry Topsiders, etc. I’m country, but I’m also British so I’m not 100% Bama. But I can in no way relate to a thug type dude.
@JG*, Do I have any veto power…cause the bow-tie…..
@Amadeo, Ladies Love Bow Ties
@SW, It reminds them of Chippendales’ dancers (no homo)
Maybe I’m a snob, but a “thug” in the true sense of the word doesn’t even need to look at me…nor does a feminine man. I think there is a happy medium and I’ve found it in every guy that I’ve ever liked. None of which have been “softies”,..or have teardrop tattoos on their face, a nine in their pocket and a felony on their record. I dated a couple of dudes who I suspect are thugs now (haven’t seen them in a while but they were makin their way over to that side of the tracks back then). But, I don’t like guys like that AT ALL. I don’t look down at black girls who do though cause that’s just more of my kind of men for me
…
Lauren London does get the side eye though cause Lil’ Wayne is the ULTIMATE in gross.
As a girl, growing up in the hood, all I saw were thugs. And then going to private schools, I saw the “good” guys. The people that I went to school with did not have that conflict of the thug lifestyle and the women that love them. I’ve associated “good” guys with the “right” type of lifestyle. So am I attracted to thugs?…HELL NO. Personally, I think the women that follow the bad boys are immature. Every woman has a bad boy stage, but quite a few get over it. Hopefully, she get over it before she ends up pregnant with two toddlers at her side chasing the baby daddy for money and fighting his side pieces.
@Alyson,
Good post. I also grew up in the hood and find many of “coporate America” beliefs about black people to be true. Don’t get confused..I am black and love being black, have black children and still live in a black community. I am a positive product of my enviorment and choose to raise my kids that way. I don’t like the thugs or anything street. I don’t want this influencing my children. What kind of life is it to be unemployed, living on welfare and waiting on”Mookie” to get out of jail? What can I expect ou of him? who will hire him, etc. I love positive men only. I hate the thug mentality and think they have been mislead. Yes it is a cold world out there for anybody and any race. However if Africans and any other immigrant can flee to America and gain citizenship, learn english, set up shops, jobs and in 10 years become millionaires…what is our problem? Yes racism is still here and there are many people that don’t want us to succeeed, but most thugs I know find this as a excuse to not do any better than what they are doing. I hate that.
HA!! Who wants to even give black women a chance even if she is still single!?!? Hey, fellas, I’m tired of screaming this, so its gonna be the last time. Take it from an old soldier. From the military, to the streets to the corporate boardrooms, black females today are like computer viruses with multiple Trojan horse and worm applications, they are programmed to destroy, even if they profess to desire a “good” black man.
Stop putting all these frigging conditions on your acceptance of them. “Unless” “Until” “When” You dudes have got me F’D up with that line of logic. Don’t you get it?!? Black females don’t need you, and they don’t want to see you surpass them in any field of endeavor!!! Okay!?! An empowered black man/men for them is like a target package for a cluster bomb, she may instinctively seek you out, but it is NOT to build you up,
it is to BLOW YOU OFF OF THE MAP!!! All over these threads,guys keep sending half-hearted love letters to these black girl bombs, before they go off, like you can disarm and defuse them with sad, soulful confessions of unrequited love or rejection as hard-pecker teenagers, or high school Romeos. Pathetic.
No matter what your situation is right now, realize one thing, THESE BITCHES DO NOT RESPECT YOU. That is the real foundation for any hope of a relationship. What does a black bitch really want from you today? To be a drone, a servant,
or a supplier, but all for her needs, and her needs alone. That isn’t love, that’s usury, and you need to wake up to that reality. Stop being the slave/buck and make yourself into a man for the 21st century, that’s the thing you should be concentrating on!! Upgrade!! Only when you have punched through all of the shit that America hands you as a black man, and gained respect, recognition and fear as a force to be reckoned with, will your true helpmate emerge!!! Easy?? NOT AT ALL!! Worth it?!? NO QUESTION!!!
STOP strumming your guitar and singing your lyrics to her dude, you’re only a source of amusement.STAND UP and be a real man!! When you do that, black broads fall back and fall off like a scab on an old wound. I’ve said enough. There it is.