Open Letter to Chris Brown: Stop being a Jackass

Spread it!

Share

Email This

Dear Chris Brown,

Eat a d**k.  I know, that was kinda harsh.  I usually wait until I’m a few sentences in before I come off so vulgar but honestly I’ve reached my boiling point with you and your idiocy.  Everyone excuses your dumb behavior on you being young, but I’m sorry I’m not buying that. I would have thought your mother would have sat you down and explained how you need to adjust your behavior and attitude.  I would have thought an uncle or other father figure would have come out to school you on how to be a man.  At the very least I would have thought your PR team would have stepped in, told you to stay off Twitter and put on an image so squeaky clean and toned down that it would make Rod & Todd Flanders look like Dennis the Menace.  But alas, it seems that none of that has happened. Instead we’ve gotten a peek into your immaturity with your semi-rants on Youtube & Twitter.  You’re like a child that was grounded for beating up another child.  Sure, you got a “punishment” but it’s the equivalent of sending a child to their room when that room is filled with TV, phone and Xbox.  You obviously haven’t come to grips with the fact that people aren’t going to be able to just ignore the horrible things you’ve done and that it will take time for some people to be able to support you, if at all.

Because it seems no one has actually broken it down for you, allow me:

Chris Brown, you are a woman beater.  A convicted felon.  We (meaning the general public) can argue  about who started it and truth be told, only you and Rihanna really know what happened that night.  But none of that matters.  See, you pleaded guilty to felony assault.  Guilty.  In my opinion you got off  with a slap on the wrist but that doesn’t change the severity of what you did, nor does it change the fact that in court…you pleaded guilty.  That means according to the laws of this land, you are a convicted woman beater.  I can’t stress this enough.  This isn’t like me calling R. Kelly a pedophile.  See, as sick as it makes me, R. Kelly was found “Not Guilty”.  So as much as I call Robert Kelly a perverted sick man who preys on young girls, he is an innocent man according to the law.  You however, are not.  Maybe your PR team didn’t really explain to you what that means.

What that means is while you were sentenced to doing community service & probation, the rest of the public (at least those of us with sense) will treat you like the convicted felon you are.  That means if a women’s group protests outside your concert, you can’t call them “Haters”. They aren’t “hating” on you because you are a successful singer but rather because you beat a woman’s face in.  You can’t tweet a rant about how stores have “black balled” you and won’t put your album out on shelves.  Are you that brain dead?  Do you not realize WHY they have black balled you?  You were convicted of beating a woman.  Not just any woman, a famous woman. What did you think was gonna happen?  Nothing? On top of that you went into a Walmart.  Walmart, the bastion of Christian existence that won’t even sell a Common CD unedited because it has an “Explicit Lyrics” label on it.  See, every time you go on one of these rants, either consciously or subconsciously, you are painting yourself as a victim and I’m sorry, but as a convicted woman beater, you can’t claim to be a victim.  Instead of b*tching about how stores won’t carry your album, instead you should be grateful that anyone is carrying your album and that you aren’t behind bars somewhere braiding some guy nicknamed “Big D”’s hair.

Now I know there are some people out there that say you are sorry and remorseful for what happened.  I’m sorry, I haven’t been swindled.  Michael Vick went to jail for almost 2 years and came back and is playing in the NFL as a backup quarterback.  I’ve never seen a man so humbled, yet appreciative of being given a second chance.  I’m sure he’s won some people over with the way he’s acted.  Plaxico Burress came off more remorseful and believable than you and he shot himself.  Think about that for a minute.  Burress victimized himself by pulling a Cheddar Bob and yet he still seems to “get it”.  You on the other hand, with every interview and Twitter outburst seem to only make a mockery of the fact that you were let off the hook.  First you came out with that bogus Youtube apology wearing that red-Captain Crunch shirt that was so awkward looking even Michael Jackson would have said “That’s ignorant.”  Then you did an interview wearing that ridiculous bow tie which I swear was a ploy to keep people from realizing you spent an hour with Larry King not saying shyt.  Sprinkle in a few more interviews along with random online postings of you saying “Don’t believe everything you hear” and “Wait for the whole story to come out” and a bunch of other ridiculous innuendo that somehow you were the victim being railroaded in the media and you have what I can only describe as a man who is delusional at best. What you should be doing is thanking the Lord that the majority of your fans either have short memories, a lack of moral fortitude or both.  You should make your music, thank your fans and stay the f*ck off the Internet because obviously you have no idea how much of a unremorseful douchebag a**hat you’re making yourself look like.  That’s what you should be doing.  And if you don’t, then don’t be surprised when people like me remind others how much of a jackass you are.

With all due disrespect,

Kriss

As I was writing this, it appears that Chris Brown’s twitter account was deleted.  Apparently his PR team woke up from their year long slumber and finally started to actually work for their client.  Having his rants appear on the front page of the HuffingtonPost after he drops an album making him look like a jackass probably is what woke them up.  Sadly, I still don’t think Brown get’s it.

Tagged as: Chris Brown, Graffiti, PR, Rihanna, Twitter, Walmart

Article by

Kriss believes that if uneducated idiots like Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh can make a living spewing hateful, untrue fantasies, then damn it…he should be able to be a truthful asshole for a living. Kriss has been diagnosed with a severe allergy to stupidity and people that irrational decisions. He likes to point out the fools on both sides of the aisle, be it democrat, republican, black or white…it doesn’t matter. Kriss is also the creator of TheInsanityReport.com and host of the award winning Insanity Check Podcast.

has written 34 article(s) for us.