There’s something in the red kool-aid and the B-Listers on down are drinking gallons of it. It’s making them do things they once thought beneath them, things I thought once beneath them. It’s forcing them to all seem so common. It’s setting them up with a half hour of cable prime time starring in their very own reality TV shows.
With a burst of lace fronts, VH-1, Style, BET and the lot are all welcoming the sistas to the reality TV game.
It’s like the Latin invasion, only with surgically engineered solid C-cups and more melanin.
I call them “The One-timers”.
There’s Chilli, one time singer for the group TLC; Shaunie O’Neal, one time wife to basketball player, Shaq; Pep, one time rapper from the group Salt N Pepa,; Lisa Raye, one time actress; and Brandi, one time teen star, actress and singer. The recurrent theme amongst the One-Timers’ shows is “I can’t get a man.”
Don’t you wanna love me? Cuz I don’t really love myself.
In the first episode of “What Chilli wants”, Chilli shares her list of requirements and in addition to no scrubs, she doesn’t want a man that smokes, drinks or eats pork. (Cue the BowTie choir singing, “There’s a place for us”).
Matchmaker Tionna Smalls recruits potentials for Chilli at a Braves game. After corralling several gents into a room and tossing out such deeply meaningful questions like “Are you a freak”, and asks to see their abs as a 6 pack is another requirement of Chilli’s, Tionna finally presents one hopeful- a good looking personal trainer- to Chilli…and a room full of other women for their consensus of approval. He was denied. (awwww…)
As for the latest in Brandy’s world, she was invited to attend the Grammy’s with Flo-Rida, then uninvited because neither of them wanted the media to think they were “together”.
Brandy, how you gon’ get fired on your day off?? And Flo got invited to the Grammy’s and you didn’t? Girl, get back in the studio NOW. And fire your hairstylist. I’ve never seen a weave go all the way to the bridge of someone’s nose like that. I say this with love.
Pep and Basketball Wives are essentially the very same show with different women portraying the role of scorned ex. Out of the
Mama always said it ain’t trickin’ if you got it!
entourage of supposed Basketball Wives, only ONE has been wifed, another divorced and the rest appear to be baller groupies that lucked into child support. They spend their days shopping and their nights at the club, then meet for cocktails to complain about how good they used to have it when they were with the men that cheated on them.
Lisa Raye says she was driven to the new show by a desire to “come back to her brand”, but outside of portraying a stripper in the film Player’s Club, I’m not aware of her having a brand. In a recent interview when confronted with the perception many have of her as a gold digger, Lisa Raye said, “I dug for gold in high school. I’m a platinum girl now. I’m an international person.” Well, yes, she is an international something. Now, she insists upon only dating men with money because she believes in moving forward after the much publicized split from husband Michael Misick, Turks and Caicos Premier. She’s been romantically linked to Nelly, Ocho Cinco and even Al Sharpton. I understand that it may be difficult to find someone with the same level of success you have, but come on, isn’t Gerardo still available? Sisquo?
She did a spread in the April edition of Black Men magazine scantily clad in a bikini, although she admits it was 23 degrees in the desert where they filmed. She is
I am not a whore. I just act, look and think like one.
taking issue with the magazine’s publishing of several photos she deemed inappropriate claiming she was unprepared for the shots even though she is looking right into the camera lens. If I were trying to avoid the publication of provocative and embarrassing pictures of my assets, I would probably put on some damn clothes before the photographer showed up, but that’s just me.
Ladies, did you get jealous of Flava Flav and Ray J? Is that really how you want to be remembered? Is this all black women are because between Stella, Steve Harvey and these shows, they’re giving the other folk that impression.
I don’t consider any of these shows a benign form of entertainment. All of them are a continued perpetration of the myth that black men are nearly extinct or chock full o’problems and black women regardless of level of success just can’t find a man; a myth disproven by statistics and happy relationships around the globe. If Lisa Raye can’t find a man, it’s probably because she is a gold-digger and men with sense can read any one of her 200 interviews stating as much. If Chilli can’t find a man, it might be because she has a list taller than she is of male requirements but none for herself. If Brandy can’t find a man, it’s probably because as evidenced by the show, she can’t seem to cut the apron strings from her family, and her family can’t cut ties with scandal and trifling. And as for the basketball “wives”, well, honestly what man is going to waste his time when he knows a date with you will cost him half plus alimony. So what I’m saying is, Ladies, you’re probably the reason why you’re single. Michelle Obama didn’t seem to have a problem.
If there is any good to come from this new direction in reality TV I guess it’s that it took our minds away from Tiny and Toya and Keyshia Cole’s crazy ass family for a few episodes.
My advice to the entire cast of reality world newbies is this: When you’re DOING YOU, it appeals to others and they’re more apt to want to do you too. Remember your talents and what made you famous in the first place. So Pep, Brandy and Chilli, go make a record. Lisa Raye, find a pole.
I’m just saying.
Miss Blurbette: As a single mother, Blurbette is your typical down-home-Mid-western girl next door…except, well- she’s Black, Southern born, living with disability, Agnostic, wayyyy left of center and doesn’t actually live next door to you-or does she? Blurbette has been writing social and political commentary with a feministic edge since that ill-received 4thgrade paper entitled “The Legacy of Frederick Douglass: Why I must choose between chocolate or white milk.” Oh yes, you love her already.
Article by Sable Verity
Sable Verity is a reporter and commentator based in Seattle who covers social and political issues for KBCS Radio and a number of online and print news outlets. Her work can be found at sableverity.com
Sable has written 50 article(s) for us.
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
This article hit the nail right on the head – I couldn't have said it better myself. Most of these participants most likely thought (when it comes to reality shows): "If you can't beat them, join them," at the expense of dumming down their previous image for a chance to become a reality star.
"If Lisa Raye can’t find a man, it’s probably because she is a gold-digger and men with sense can read any one of her 200 interviews stating as much. If Chilli can’t find a man, it might be because she has a list taller than she is of male requirements but none for herself. If Brandy can’t find a man, it’s probably because as evidenced by the show, she can’t seem to cut the apron strings from her family, and her family can’t cut ties with scandal and trifling. And as for the basketball “wives”, well, honestly what man is going to waste his time when he knows a date with you will cost him half plus alimony. So what I’m saying is, Ladies, you’re probably the reason why you’re single."
@Sable Verity – I read this and thought to myself "wow, is this what it's come to?" In my opinion, putting one's self out there in the manner of these women will add to the struggle of finding your soulmate. It doesn't have to be that way. Personally, as a single, successful and spiritual Black woman, I've accepted that in order to be linked with that person, I know that I am One with God, and through God ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE! Trust, live and be in the moment. I must also recognize and accept who I TRULY am, not change or evolve into someone else just to have companionship. When the right person comes along, you'll just know. No list of standard or expectations will ever supercede that. I have faith that, in time, I will know who that person is – even if it takes my entire lifetime here, I will wait. Patience, trust and faith "of a mustard seed" comes from getting to know who we really are – and from the looks of it, these women have some work to do…
"Brandy, how you gon’ get fired on your day off?? And Flo got invited to the Grammy’s and you didn’t? Girl, get back in the studio NOW. And fire your hairstylist. I’ve never seen a weave go all the way to the bridge of someone’s nose like that. I say this with love."
I just died. LOL I turned to this show after Twitter peer pressured me into it and her ponytail lace front scared the hell out of me! It's sooooo unnatural looking. I'd have been happier for her if she did a good sew-in. Sheesh.
I hate reality tv.
I must mention that the things I say about these women are not in judgement, but in LOVE. We must all encourage and uplift each other to reach our greatest good. I hope and pray that, in some point in their lives, they find time to go within and connect with their Truth and not the expectations of others…
This is the TRUTH: “All of them are a continued perpetration of the myth that black men are nearly extinct or chock full o’problems and black women regardless of level of success just can’t find a man; a myth disproven by statistics and happy relationships around the globe.”
Thanks to the fact that reality shows started off starring nothing but psycho, rich, bored white people wanting to eat roaches on Fear Factor, live in a house with strangers on Real World or vote people off some dumb island on Survivor, I have never liked reality shows.
Now that black people have gotten into the reality show thing, it’s even worse! I gave Real Housewives of Atlanta a chance during the first season and I can suffer through Tyra Banks on America’s Next Top Model on a snow day, but I this post has reminded me why I skip the majority of that junk. I’d rather watch some other happily-ever-after, scripted, syndicated sitcom with the laugh-track included.
All these shows do, is make even the “rare good brotha” even more pissed off, than he is already.
As I am in general agreement with so much of this post, I will now simply highlight some of the article enhancers that tickled my fancy!
“… (Cue the BowTie choir singing, “There’s a place for us”).”
“So Pep, Brandy and Chilli, go make a record. Lisa Raye, find a pole.”
My day in now complete!
This is funny but sad… When will people wake up!
Honestly, you really can’t get mad cause they choose to put themselves out there to stay relevant…either folks are desperate for a check or still need/want to find some way to keep themselves in the lime light…whatever the reason its sad and ridiculous people will go to so low of a level for self promotion…low key, does brandy have any hair left cause that joint on her head looks like a hairnet with some sewn in sheep hair…
to keep it short, I can still see how these shows can do some good. Sometimes, when you don’t know what you want, figure out what you don’t, within reason of course (Chilli’s another case). These shows can show women everywhere what NOT to resemble when looking for love, or anything for that matter.
- JP
“Ladies, you’re probably the reason why you’re single. Michelle Obama didn’t seem to have a problem.”
Quality.
isn’t there some new spit coming out, hip hop girlfriends or wives or some shyt?
Anyway, I dont care TOO much what other women do…they have nothing to do with me. Someone will watch these shows, I’m sure I would if I had cable..but I don’t..soo….
I agree that these women should stick to what made them famous however there is no question that their present situation is a result of the extreme shallowness. Each woman has some level of talent–sexual or otherwise–but they have made NO effort to cultivate skills and interests that would make them an asset to a real man. All they do is talk about themselves and the problems of their own making. They rest on their looks and believe that their “status” affords them the pick of the litter. When they don’t get it, they complain about others and call them haters.
It is frustrating the double standard of black women in the current media and the roles that are socially acceptable. In reality world, ghetto, gold diggin and superficial behavior is acceptable, in the real world you catch slack for acting as such…. I rarely watch tv but I am disgusted when I do by the way people carry on.
THANK YOU!!!
These women are NOT stereotypes. I wish they were. These are the women that men want, and what other women strive to be. It's really sad because they are totally oblivious to their ridiculous mentality. I watched Lisa Raye, only because I'm from Chicago, and wow, I mean wow, talk about Karma. She not about to get a dime from dude. And she was linked with Al Sharpton? ROTFLMFAO!!!! YOOOOOO!!! Let me find out Al hitting that!!! I was wondering WTF he was doing at her crib, it was soooo Random. On both parts. They all complain about men, when they all came up off of a man's success. I wish all of these chicks would just shut the hell up and cash in thier coochie checks and buy a decent weave and a thesaurus and stay the hell off my tv. These kinds of shows are not even funny after smoking weed. I'm so glad I have a son, these little girls are going to be fucked up man, do you know how many little girls out here know how to drop it like it's hot and already have a weave before they can even spell lacefront? They all are going to be goldding idiots whose only goal in life is to look good, trap a man and fuck a member Waka Flocka Flames entourage. Education? Who needs that shit when you got a fat ass. Actually if you're smart that's a strike against you. You gotta be dumber than Gucci Mane these days. Or at least act like you are. Get the degree, just to say you got it, but don't ACTUALLY learn anything. What's wrong with you, bad bitches not supposed to have intellegence. All you need to know is how to clap your booty and do undercover bi-sexual shit. The degree is simply for bragging rights. You know its true.
I told one of my girls not to talk to be about anything regarding a person that has a penis…………………………………….I haven't heard from her since. Try it, watch how many of these chicks LITERALLY would be at a lose of words. All they do is complain about the man they chose, the man they lost, the man they got kids by, your man, the man they made up in their heads, the man that beats her ass and cheats, the next man, man-tan, mandingo, etc………..And if they read, it's usually only books about………..men or Relationships with men……….Know wonder Black men act the way they do, look at the pickings, mentally challenged arm candy. They even ruin good Brothas, get with one of these women and watch Baby Mama all of a sudden be a MAJOR part of your vocab. Get with one of these chicks, all of a sudden, that one Tyler Perry movie was good. Get with one of these chicks, all of a sudden, "I don't mind weave". Get with one of these chicks, all of a sudden, "R Kelly is a genius, and that wasn't him on that tape. And once a Black Man has been in any kind of relationship with one of these chicks? It's over, he's dead, soul lost, he will never have respect for another woman, how could you after being with something that looked so good on the outside and was so ugly on the inside. All these bitches do is create distrust in a man's eyes when it comes to our motives. Imma start hanging out at High School Graduations to find a man, lol, I'm bound to find one who hasn't been a casualty of some deadly eye candy. Bell Biv Devoe tried to tell ya'll niggas a long time ago, "Never trust a big butt and a smile, that girl is POISON." That ain't no damn song!!! That's a reality!!! You lose about 75% of your common sense when you fall for one of these women. And the REAL reason these Basket ball wives or Chilli, or whoever can't find a man is because between all of them, shiiiid, they done had them all, the ones with money anyway. Anytime Al Sharpton is getting action from Lisa Raye, you know its a drought. To bad Desperate Housewives was already taken. It's a ho extravaganza in this bitch!! "Every ho MUST go"!!!!!
There are a lot of family-oriented, do the right thing, moral having, do-not-shame-your-family-name, black pride, God believing, great black men and women out here. The ones that are the backbone of a lot dysfunctional, nigger acting, sad, crazy black families. It speaks to how low we have sunk as a people to let ourselves be exploited like we are. Imagine a hooker walking down the street saying, or a drug dealer saying, "Come and get it!!! Got the hot stuff right here!! " Now as you watch television, as late as 4-28-2010 on the beyond question to most of you, grand wizard exalted, "Queen Oprah", here is the promo: "More Sad Relevations From Todd Bridges". Someone needs to smack the hell out of all of us for buying into this Willie Lynch bullshit. Fuck Chilli, Fuck Shaq's wife, Ray-J, Brandy and their parents, the Atlanta housewives, and all of the media whores who will sell out their race for a couple of quarters. And another thing, I ain't hardly mad at the Latino Nation at all. They do what they do and it is always family first. You can advance with hard work and God on your side and family. Black people, we have been, in the words of Malcolm X and Spike Lee……"Bamboozled!!!" You will watch that dumb shit, but make excuses about not watching "Treme". Dumb ass niggers.
Its very sad that not only women that associated with wealth and fame cant get a man, but the average black woman cant either. I think that the black community has been plagued with the "booty call" mentality that no one is interested in a serious commitment. Its all about having a relationship with no strings attached. It really makes it hard out for the woman that are actually looking for a real committed relationship.
on the flip side of this, i guess leila arcieri tryed to get with jamie foxx & that didn't work out. or she didn't know that jamie has a thing for white women, now lisa raye is in the same boat as leila, k.d.aubert & daphnee duplaix. can't get the right mainstream roles or don't won't/like those type of flims, just maybe they don't wanted to be exposed to much. knowbody knows what go's threw there mind when there reading for those roles? so sure pepa, brandy & chill should be makeing records but there not, lisa raye could be do what leila & daphnee doing right now but not thing about it.